How To: Make Nature Your Friend

1. Watch pocahontas.
2. Go for a nature walk and ponder the deepest philosophical question- whether you can paint with all the colours of the wind.
3. Upon finding your answer you should discover your true natural roots*
4. Create a new name for yourself**
5. Create a marking of your new name on a tree, this is your new home.
6. Explore your new neighbourhood, and introduce yourself to your new neighbours and get on their good side***
7. To become friends with the bears, you will have to compliment them like there is no tomorrow.****
8. Once all your neighbours have been won over, dub yourself the new king and/or queen of: Land of (insert nature name here)*****

*Even though you've found your natural identity, nature is not yet your friend, because nature doesn't play easy like civilization does.
**Example: Sacagawesome, Pocahotty, HueJass and Leaf.
***Bears are the hardest to achieve friendship with.
****NEVER call a bear "big guy" they are highly sensitive about their weight. Use such compliments as, "were you in the charmin commercial? 'cause you look like a model, daaaayuum.". This will make them love you.
*****Nature will instantly become your friend.